Lean in to Cravings Without Deprivation
Managing a craving seems to come with white knuckling, binging or denying ourselves, doesn’t it?
We all have been there. It’s been a long day, you’re tired, and you just want chocolate. You tell yourself you shouldn’t eat it, you should get back on a diet, and you’re being bad. This serves no one.
Oh, except the diet industry.
The definition of CRAVING as stated by Merriam Webster, is “an intense, urgent, or abnormal desire or longing”. That about sums it up, when you’re crazily ripping apart your kitchen for something sweet or salty during that time of the month, doesn’t it?
Cravings can be physical, like the PMS chocolate tornado, or emotional, when we just want to feed sorrow with a bucket of ice cream. What about spiritual hunger? When we feel lost, alone and confused? Food becomes a great tool for shovelling emotions away, or, down into the stomach.
In this moment of emotional struggle, do we REALLY care, about what sugar, salt or fat does to our brain and bodies? I
’m going to say NO, we don’t.
(What’s the science behind that anyway? More to come on THAT.)
If we aren't present, we won’t understand where the hunger comes from. If we don’t look at the feelings, the cycle of eat-guilt-eat continues. So having that controlling information about the effect of sugar and our brain, may be completely useless in that moment.
“I can remember carving the first slice, taking the first forkful. The rush of whipped sugar speeding through my bloodstream. It felt like teetering on the ledge of a roof off a skyscraper, exhilarating and terrifying. The split second decision between balance and oblivion.
What I cannot remember, however, is the exact moment I made the decision to eat the whole thing.”
Andie Mitchell's book, It Was Me All Along, A Memoir, hooked me from the introduction. I related to her childhood of self soothing with food, a slim brother, and dysfunction. This quote stuck with me.
How do we understand our food triggers in a way that makes us lean in and not guilt ourselves?
Here are 5 tips to start to unravel this.
And girl, you can also just eat the chocolate.
1. Get into the craving.
When you're in the middle of a huge wash of cookie dough fantasy, tune into your feelings and your hunger. You are in need of some comfort. What could you give yourself besides food?
Find what nourishes you OTHER than food, once a craving hits you like a hot flash in winter.
It goes like this:
Mind, section 1: I want chocolate.
Mind, section 2: You shouldn’t eat that, you “need” to lose weight.
Right? Herein, lies the struggle
By “getting in to the craving” you can DECIDE to eat the chocolate, how much of it (next tip), and why you are going to eat it. Are you hungry right now? Will ONLY chocolate satisfy one of your hungers?
The goal is to interrupt the thought process around the craving and bring you into consciousness around your need for food.
2. Start slow.
Slowing down while you enjoy your chocolate, or the most satisfying treat you are thinking of, can help you tune in to your food and relish the taste and texture. This is a mindful tactic for ALL meals.
Why?
The body gets time to tell the brain, "hey, something good is coming", This way digestive juices are flowing, priming your gut, and the senses are primed for complete enjoyment.
Eating slowly allows you to taste your chocolate, or your meal. Really TASTE it. Slowness helps you nurture that gourmet inside you, and helps you decide how good, or surprisingly, not so good, a food is.
If you currently feel like eating a little bit isn't possible, or that you will berate yourself for your behaviour after, then try to …
3. Shift your mindset
When you face a craving, get behind it, and get curious about it, you can shift your thinking. Instead of pushing the feelings away, try what author Andrea Leiberstein suggests, in her book Well Nourished.
Having “open allowing attention, helps counteract the energy of struggle and resistance that arises when we try to avoid a feeling or judge it.” Instead of struggling, welcome your feelings, and just notice, without judgement, what you are going through.
Bring curiosity to your craving.
You want chocolate, but you aren’t hungry. Take a few breaths. How do you feel? Anxious? Mad? Rejected? Defeated?
What will make you feel better, if you don’t eat the chocolate? Will that work? Or do will you just consciously decide to HAVE the chocolate.
This takes practice and is something I bring to the Mind Meet Food Method.
4. Eat food.
If you aren't getting nutrients, your body will cry foul and ask for MORE food. When you are not eating enough nutrients, the body thinks it hasn't been fed.
Make your choices as nourishing as possible, but try to leave a little room for fun food, so that you don’t dip into a restriction mentality.
Our taste buds get used to the engineered flavours in processed food. Our lives are very busy, and grabbing food on the go is sometimes a necessity. Forgive yourself if you choose to do this, enjoy your food choice and move on. Don’t do penance with a salad or starvation at the next meal. That’s a diet rearing it’s ugly head, and this doesn’t feed your hormones, your bones, or your soul. If you are over 50, balancing pleasure and body processed are a necessity!
5. Hydrate as best you can.
Drink your water. Sip through the day, including upon waking. So many benefits come from hydration, including better skin, flushing and hydrating the body, decreased fatigue and increased energy.
What does fatigue and energy have to do with cravings? If your body is tired, it looks for a stimulant to wake it up. That can mean caffeine, sugar, cigarettes or other things.
Wouldn’t it be nice to choose and enjoy your chocolate from a place of energy, rather than exhaustion? Your enjoyment factor of that chocolate just shot up 100%.
When you taste it and enjoy it your brain knows you ATE it.
Remember, it isn't a reflection on your ability and willpower if you enjoy certain foods. Savour the flavour, slowly, with focus on what you are seeing, smelling and tasting. Slow down your eating.
Even if you lose control and binge on more than a serving (or two) of whatever, it doesn't mean that you have "failed". You may have just mindlessly ate. We all do that.
You may have eaten some feelings.
There is alway a new choice around the corner.
Acknowledge that you are human and you are just BEING. Move on, journal your thoughts to let them go, and don't use your negative voice to punish yourself!
If you are curious about Mindful Eating Coaching, and how it can fit into your unique life, schedule a free 30 minute discussion with me, right here!
Be Well, Be happy, enjoy your chocolate and...
Be Kind to Yourself.
Tanya