Create a Balanced Life for Menopause in 2023. Drop the "this NOT that" Mindset.
It’s hard to Find Balance in Life, with so many confusing opinions on health and wellness.
Health and nutrition information for menopause is so informative.
And so conflicting. Polarizing, even,
Much of the nutrition advice out there tells us to eat this, NOT that.
Eat honey, NOT refined sugar.
Drink dandelion beverages and mushroom coffee, NOT regular coffee or tea.
Use Ezekiel bread, not regular bread, unless it’s sourdough.
This episode and blog post was inspired by real clients. One woman had tried the milk cleanse, another was crying over her guilt of eating bread, and the topic of parasite cleansing was a recurring theme.
It brings up something that’s been on my heart for a while and that I have shared on and off, on Instagram. I’m tired of polarization of what people do, or even represent, when it comes to health.
If you want to create a “balanced” lifestyle in menopause, drop the all or nothing mindset.
Yes, there are some questionable health practices out there, and yes questionable people selling these practices. Every space, or business, or profession, has people like this. I don't want to be one of them. I do not do this intentionally.
My content, and resources do evolve as I evolve and I do try to share with integrity.
Nothing I am saying is ever medical advice. I share guests, education and my story. I believe true holistic health involves licensed care practitioners, so if you have health issues, please seek a licensed practitioner for your physical and mental health, if you are suffering from a health condition, eating disorder or any mental or physical health issue
This podcast episode may not be for you as I am talking about trendy health practices and IF they can actually fit into a non diet life.
My first client this week was feeling great after doing the milk cleanse. Have you heard of the milk cleanse? I’ll cover this in another post/episode. This lady is in her 60s, and always looking to help her health, her joint pain, and feel good post menopause.
In fact she had a clear definition of what made her feel good.
She came to me to talk about her nutrition and gut, in a non diet way.
She is curious and keeps exploring. I love the concept of curiosity, when it comes to health. This is one of the sessions in my Mindless to Mindful Course. Curiosity belongs in your toolkit when you are working on your relationship to food. She did not do this practice, the milk cleanse, looking to lose weight. She was curious about her gut, the possibility of a microbiome imbalance, did her research, found it financially accessible and decided to give it a go.
She weighed her pros and cons, and felt there was no negative consequences for her, to do this cleanse.
My second client was a mom who fell apart because she ate a piece of bread. She sufferers from extreme fatigue and had 4 kids, and was working with a nutritionist who put her on a restricted diet. When her period hits she feels so sick that the only thing that calms her stomach is bread and peanut butter. She is so depleted she feels, has so much nausea, and she broke down explaining her guilt around bread.
My third encounter this week was a person who messaged me, wanting to know about parasite cleansing. They have gut issues and were curious. There is that word again. Curious. They saw some influencers saying it was a sham, and some who thought that parasite cleansing changed their health in a big way.
They wanted to know my opinion on parasite cleansing. (I have shared on IG that I have done a parasite cleanse.)
All three scenarios were different, but I approach them all the same.
Holding space for the things that matter, and holding space for options.
One woman discovered a practice, used discernment and judgement and decision making to come to her own conclusions about whether to try the practice. She was clear on her intention, didn’t search for something specific, like weight loss, but was curious about how she would feel.
The woman who felt such guilt around the bread, had me thinking. How did we get here, where we are so black and white about WHAT we eat. In this context, something that gave her energy when she was feeling so lethargic, unable to cook for herself and barely able to eat, WAS NOURISHMENT.
To be clear, she was not being told she was awful for eating bread by her current nutritionist. There was some talk about getting back on track, to eliminate foods though. I silently asked myself: why.
Why can we not hold space for BOTH things, for all things, depending on the context, when it comes to food, and health? One person’s preference is another persons poison.
I just watched a Ted X video about the concept, or skill of living in the AND. I've talked about this subject in my Instagram stories, and I related this to food and the wellness world.
What do I mean by living in the AND?
It's about holding space for two things at once. The Ted X video talked about living in the AND as a skill. The skill of holding space for two separate things, namely emotions. You can be happy and sad all at the same time.
This is opposite to the concept of what is called dualistic thinking. Our minds work on dualistic thinking, much of the time. Dualistic thinking is a rational way of thinking that separates and sorts concepts into parts. It helps us see the world as THIS or THAT.
When you make a rule to NEVER eat candy and ONLY eat fruit. You have created a dualistic way of thinking about this. Many people have a dualistic model of thinking about food.
If you do, this may be serving you well in many aspects of your health.
I am not saying it is wrong.
In fact, this type of thinking has been needed to survive and to make sense of the world around us.
If everything is looked at with a dualistic set of glasses on, this creates some conflict. Some things can be a BOTH. Food can be a this AND that, depending on your needs and wants at the time.
What if health can be in the world of BOTH?
Isn't that truly holistic?
If we stay in this dualistic way of thinking all the time, what are we missing? Maybe we miss an opportunity to understand someone else's point of view.
I think we miss an opportunity to explore ways of living that make sense to our own lives. We miss the opportunity to change course. Maybe we miss opportunity to live fully in a stage of life where living in the world of BOTH can bring more joy!
When it comes to food, and health, having a BOTH mentality holds space for all kinds of thoughts, practices and ways of healthy living that you may never even have entertained if you lived in the THIS OR THAT mode
The wellness world can be as polarizing as any other workspace, community or conversation out in the world. Especially right now. The world is divided, and has been for so long, on may levels.
In the wellness space, there is so much eat this, not that type of advice.
Or advice that says THIS is healthy but not that.
Here are some more examples:
Sugar is evil.
No pain no gain: ok that one may be dated.
Fasting is for everyone if you want to be healthy,
Don't eat white carbs
Don't eat simple carbs
Eat fructose. Don't eat fructose
You don't need iron and so on
Stop and think, where are you living in the OR space, the space where you say it can only be THIS NOT that? Some of this thinking may apply to you, depending on your situation. It may be serving you and your needs
There may be things that you just CAN’T eat, or just CAN’T do, because of a health condition, mobility issues, religious beliefs OR it just goes against your personal value system.
Where in your life can you invite in some BOTH. Where can you go beyond this OR that?
MINDFUL EATING FITS.
I started talking about this is because I am a multipassionate person, in the health space. I am also a person who likes to learn about different concepts in the health space.
I’ve worked with clients clinically, in dental hygiene for years. When wearing that hat, I had to live in the world of BOTH, because not everything can be this or that when it comes to a single person.
That is client centered care.
In the health space, as a coach, it’s bring that professional responsibility to offer choice, to offer questions to help reflect on what works, what does not, and what new possibilities align with you
I like to do this without focusing on intentional weight loss.
There are many non diet gurus out there that poop on some of the wellness practices offered by others in the holistic space. And some of the practices deserve a little dissection, and critical thought, when it comes to the intention of the wellness advice or practice.
I did a little dissection myself on the carrot salad trend, and I’ve linked a blog post and You Tube video below.
I realized that there can be nuggets of wisdom in mostly anything,
Just yesterday, I was reading about the milk cleanse trend. I looked it up after speaking to a client who tried the milk cleanse this year and said she felt great. She was in her sixties and tries thighs to make her feel energetic, vibrant and able to be active with her family. She definitely identified her health values.
That doesn’t mean that everyone needs or should do a milk cleanse. But there was a nugget of wisdom in there when I read the ingredients in this cleanse.
It changes the gut through herbs. Gut health is a hot topic and for good reason. Your gut microbiome changes in menopause and it changes with stress. It’s connected to the brain and is called your second brain.
Your gut can harbor parasites. THIS topic alone is polarizing on the internet. There are many influencers and health professionals saying NO you don't need to do this. The Harvard School of Public Health talks about parasites, and other organisms in the microbiome becoming unbalanced and possible leading to chronic disease.
I have also done a parasite cleanse, because I had a health issue. I wanted to see if it shifted. It did, but that is MY experience, It may not be yours and you may not desire to do these things.
I have some episodes about digestive problems in menopause, and a few episodes with an herbalist coming up too, that fits into my add in approach to wellness.
This week can you look at living with the concept of BOTH? The concept of living in the AND when it comes to food. Holding space for two things, that may fit at different times in your day, your week your life?
Living in the AND, living with the concept of BOTH, holding space for two different things, may help you make decisions where you may move to a definitive space about a food, or a movement option that makes sense to YOU.
It may become dualistic. I currently bike NOT run because of my knee. But I bring the concept of BOTH OR AND to other things. Could I bike AND do this (other thing)?
AND may I one day do BOTH again? Some things change. And some things stay the same.
I love a good smoothie bowl and I also love a really good dessert.
I love pizza AND vegetarian chili.
I love evidence based science and I love things that may seem woo.
I love clinical information about health and I LOVE energy work.
I am living my midlife years in the AND, with curiosity, and it is leading to a FULL and enriching life.
Let’s get YOU feeling that TOO.